Bobo's gone.

اَلسَّلَامُ عَلَيْكُمْ وَرَحْمَةُ اللهِ وَبَرَكَا تُهُ

Mom called last night. At first, she just asked me what am I doing etc. Before she said something that make my tears burst. Bobo died. Last Friday. The moment she kept on talking about how bobo died, I remained silent. I don't know what to say. I knew mom could hear me sobbed softly. I'm sure she heard. I knew she knew I'm crying.

Mom said that Bobo didn't come back home for almost a week. The day Naem found Bobo, those tiny legs could not move anymore. It doesn't have the strength to walk to home. Mom also said, bila Bobo baring, boleh nampak tulang kaki dia timbul. 

Bobo dah lama sakit. Even before Pamie got married. Satu per satu penyakit dia datang. Demam, selsema, sakit gigi, buah pinggang bengkak, and last sekali mak kata kaki dia dah bernanah. Mungkin ini yang terbaik untuk Bobo but... easier said than done.

Bobo jadi one of our family members masa Bubu masih ada lagi. Bobo sangat manja dengan Abah. Bobo tak keluar rumah sangat. Masa ana cuti semester, Bobo yang teman ana. Teman masak, teman lipat baju. Masa ana cuti, Bobo dah lama sakit. Dia tidur je. Ana jelah yang bagi dia makan ubat, minum air, makan whiskas guna syringe. Tu masa weekdays lah since no body's home. 

Bobo paling manja dengan Abah. Kadang-kadang bila Abah balik dari kerja, Bobo akan datang dekat dengan kaki Abah and dia akan tajamkan kuku dia dekat seluar jeans Abah. Kadang-kadang boleh dengar Abah panggil nama manja Bobo. *Family je tau macam mana Abah layan Bobo.*

Takut nak balik rumah this week. Bukan takut apa. Takut kena jugak terima hakikat yang Bobo dah takde di dunia ni. The last time jumpa dia two weeks ago. Hari ahad masa nak balik Casa tu tak jumpa pun dia. Tak cium kepala dia. Tak sempat nak peluk dia. Tak sempat nak pandang muka bayi dia buat kali terakhir.

Last night. I could not sleep. I cried again. The moment I closed my eyes shut, I could see Bobo's face. I could hear Abah's voice calling Bobo untuk makan. I missed Abah. I cried but no one knows. Eera slept early last night. I texted Ras, 'Sedihnyaaaaaaa Ras.. :'('

But still no one knows I cried last night. I don't want others to see me crying. No. I am okay. I'll be fine, InsyaAllah.

To Bobo, may you rest in peace. Mungkin ni yang terbaik untuk Bobo. It's time for you to go kan. Siapa ana nak halang dia dari pergi. Thanks for the memories Bobo. I love you. Always.   

Bobo masa kecik. :*